Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Happy 8 month Birthday Cayden!

Happy birthday Cayden! Wow, I have done it again! I am late posting this by a day again. It wasn't that I forgot though. I thought about it all day yesterday, I just wasn't by a computer most of the day and then I was so busy with the kids when I got home. I am finding it almost scary that the year anniversary of my sons birth is approaching rather quickly and that the year anniversary of losing Cayden is right after that. This time a year ago, Ryan and I were trying to find a way to tell Ant and Lexy that one of their brothers wasn't going to live! We waited 8 weeks to tell them. It was killing us that we were going to have to break their hearts. How do you sit down and tell a 5 and 9 year old that their world is about to be turned upside down and will never be the same again? Not only was my heart hurting so badly about just finding out about Cayden, but my heart was breaking for my other 2 children. People think in life that things like this will never happen to them and they take their children for granted, but it does happen...I am proof! The only thing that keeps me going everyday is my family and the fact that I know that Cayden is in a better place where he will never feel pain...and that when it is my time to leave this life...he will be there waiting for me! I miss you Cayden and I love you as much as a mother can possibly love!

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