I wanted to take a minute to write tonight, it seems as if time has gotten the best of me lately! We are so crazy busy trying to prepare for the move, but not a day goes by that I don't think of my Cayden and wish he was still here with us. When I look at Carter, I can't help but smile. I just love him so much, but it feels so unfair that I don't have Cayden to look at and feel the same way. My little Lexy loo talks about Cayden ALL the time. She asked me the other night why it has to hurt so bad? I didn't have an answer for her though. It feels like it hurts a little more everyday. I feel like I am on a roller coaster. I do ok during the day while I'm really busy, but when everyone is in bed asleep, I fall apart. I think about the days we spent with him and how lucky we were to be given that time, but yet it doesn't feel like it was long enough! What I'd give to hold him in my arms again! Good-night my love, I love you so much more then you'll ever know! Love, Mom

another sweet poem

So here I am again, crying over my computer. I seem to do that a lot lately. I am looking into a website called names in the sand, where you have your childs name written in the sand with a beautiful sunset in the background. While on the website I came across this poem and it was amazing how true it rang to me. I have always loved poems. I used to write my own growing up to express my feelings. So I am going to share it with you all!

Thinking of you with Love
We thought of you with love today,
but that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday,
and days before that too.
We think of you in silence,
we often speak your name.
All we have are memories,
and your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake,
with which we will never part.
God has you in his keeping,
we have you in our hearts.
A million times we've wanted you,
A million times we cried.
If love could only have saved you,
you never would have died.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
but you didn't go alone.
For a part of us went with you...
the day God called you home!
Wow, it really is exactly how I feel! Although, No words can ever express how much I truly miss my Cayden!

A poem for you baby boy

A Mothers Love
I didn't have to look into your eyes,
to fall in love with you.
I didn't have to hear you cry,
to know you loved me too.
I didn't need to hold your hand,
to cherish you for always.
within my womb, we shared our hearts,
you touched my soul,
you sweetened my spirit.
You gave me memories, I'll always hold dear.
yes, my heart aches since you departed too soon,
but a mothers love does not end with death.
for you are my child,
forever my love is yours!
I miss you Cayden Ryan Burns!

Happy 3 month birthday!

Happy 3 month birthday Cayden!! It is so hard to believe that 3 months ago today you were born and I was holding you in my arms! I remember laying in the hospital room with Memo and I couldn't believe that you had defied the odds and you were still with us. I would give anything to go back to that moment! I miss you so much! Love, Mom